The short answer: treat the school’s complaint as data, not a diagnosis. Four steps: (1) get specifics from the teacher — when, what exactly, compared to whom; (2) compare settings — is it school-only, or everywhere; (3) rule out the imposters — sleep, vision, hearing; (4) if the pattern is real across settings, get a structured assessment. Most of this can start this week, and none of it commits you to anything.
“He can’t focus” is a conclusion. Ask for the observations underneath it: Which lessons? What time of day? What does “can’t focus” look like — staring out the window, disturbing others, leaving his seat? How does he compare with classmates — bottom of the class on this, or just below the child beside him? What has the teacher already tried, and did anything help?
Teachers usually have this detail and rarely get asked for it. The answers frequently narrow the problem by themselves: only after lunch points somewhere different from only during writing, which points somewhere different from everywhere, always.
Step 2 — compare the settings you can see
Watch homework, meals, play, tuition. A child restless everywhere — including during activities he chose and enjoys — has a different picture from a child who is fine at cricket, focused at drawing, and dysregulated only in class. Everywhere suggests the machinery of attention itself; school-only points at something about school: the work being too hard, too easy, a vision problem meeting a distant blackboard, or a classroom dynamic.
Step 3 — rule out the imposters first
Before any bigger conversation: how is sleep, honestly — hours and quality? When were vision and hearing last checked? A tired child, a child who can’t see the board, and a child who mishears instructions all present as “won’t pay attention.” These checks are cheap, fast, and fix a surprising share of cases.
Step 4 — if the pattern holds, assess properly
If it’s real across settings and costing your child — academically, socially, or in how they talk about themselves — a structured assessment is the right next move: parent and teacher questionnaires, developmental history, and a paediatrician’s judgement. If it is ADHD, the first-line response for younger children is structured behavioural support, not automatic medication. If it isn’t, you’ll know what it is instead.
Our developmental paediatrician does exactly this assessment — and the first 30-minute consultation is free. Bring the teacher’s specifics; they make it better.
